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Elizabeth is Missing by Emma Healey - Free download as PDF File .pdf), Text File .txt) or read online for free. An internationally heralded debut novel of. Elizabeth is Missing. View PDF. book | Fiction | UK & Comm → Viking (Ed. Venetia Butterfield). US → HarperCollins (Ed. Claire Wachtel). Canada. Read {PDF Epub} Download Elizabeth Is Missing by Lillian de la Torre from the story End by philladafenster16 with 27 reads. congress.

Elizabeth Is Missing Pdf

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They began with six girls, including their nieces. Seven was the customary number. Miss Sewell defined her methods of education in her 'Principles of Education, drawn from Nature and Revelation, and applied to Female Education in the Upper Classes' Miss Sewell defied the demands of examinations, and made her pupils read widely, and take an interest in the questions of the day cf.

She herself gave admirable lessons in general history. The holidays were often passed abroad, and in Miss Sewell spent five months in Italy and Germany, the outcome of which was a volume entitled 'Impressions of Rome, Florence, and Turin' She was in Germany again at the outbreak of the war of cf.

Autobiography, pp. She had made Tennyson's acquaintance in the Isle of Wight in In Miss Sewell, convinced of the need of better education for girls of the middle class, founded at Ventnor St. Boniface School, which came to have a building of its own and to be known as St. Boniface Diocesan School. Its many years' prosperity was gradually checked by the High Schools which came into being in The death of her sister Emma in caused deep depression, and her brain became gradually clouded.

She died at Ashcliff, Bonchurch, on 17 Aug. A prayer desk was put up in memory of her by pupils and friends in Bonchurch church, where there is also a tablet commemorating Miss Sewell and her two sisters. Miss Sewell's influence over young people was helped by her dry humour. Despite her firm Anglican convictions, she won the ear of those who held other views.

She was an accomplished letter writer. Of small stature, with well-marked features, and fine brown eyes, she was painted by Miss Porter in That portrait and some sketches of her by her sister Ellen are in possession of Miss Eleanor Sewell at Ashcliff.

She wrote also many devotional works and schoolbooks. Of the former 'Thoughts for Holy Week' and 'Preparation for the Holy Communion' have been often reprinted, as late as and respectively. Her schoolbooks chiefly deal with history, and two volumes of 'Historical Selections' were written in collaboration with Miss Yonge. I cant help staring at it, sure it will move, scurry away to a corner, or eat me up and take my place. And Katy will have to remark on its big eyes, its big teeth.

All these tins of peaches! Carla shouts from the kitchen. Carla the carer. Carers is what they call them. You must stop downloading food, she calls again. I can hear the scrape of tins against my Formica worktop. You have enough for an army. Enough food. You can never have enough. Most of it seems to go missing anyway, and cant be found even after Ive bought it. I dont know whos eating it all.

My daughters the same. No more cans, Mum, she says, going through my cupboards at every opportunity. I think she must be feeding someone. Half the stuff disappears home with her, and then she wonders why I need to go shopping again. Anyway, its not like I have many treats left in life. Its not like I have many treats left, I say, pushing myself higher in my seat to make my voice carry to the kitchen.

Twists of shiny chocolate wrappers are wedged down the sides of the chair; they squirm against the cushions and I ick them away. My husband, Patrick, used to tell me off for eating sweets. I ate them a lot at home. It was nice to be able to have a sherbet lemon or a caramel cup when I wanted, as we werent allowed them at the exchange no one wants to speak to a telephonist whos got her mouth full. But he said theyd ruin my teeth. I always suspected he was more worried about my gure. Polo mints were our compromise, and I still like them, but now theres no one to stop me eating a whole box of toffees if I want them.

I can even start rst 4. Its morning now. I know because the sun is on the bird table. It shines on the bird table in the morning and the pine tree in the evening. I have a whole day to get through before the light hits that tree. Carla comes, half crouching, into the sitting room, picking up wrappers from around my feet. I didnt know you were here, dear, I say. Ive done your lunch. She snaps off plastic gloves. Its in the fridge, and Ive put a note on it.

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Its nine forty now, try not to eat it till twelve, right? She talks as if I always gobble everything up as soon as she leaves. I ask, feeling suddenly hungry. Plenty, Carla says, dropping the carers folder on to the table. Im going now. Helenll be here later, all right?

The front door clicks shut and I hear Carla locking it after her. Locking me in. I watch her through the window as she crunches across my path.

She wears a coat with a fur-edged hood over her uniform. A carer in wolf s clothing. When I was a girl Id have been glad to have the house to myself, to eat things out of the larder and wear my best clothes, to play the gramophone and lie on the oor.

Now Id rather have the company. The lights been left on and the kitchen seems like an empty stage set when I go in to rearrange my cupboards and check what Carla has left me for lunch.

I half expect someone to come in, my mother with her shopping or Dad with arms full of sh and chips, and say something dramatic, like in one of those plays at the Pier Theatre. Dad would say: Your sister is gone, and thered be a drum or a trumpet or something, and Ma would say: Never to return, and wed all stare at each other for the benet of the audience.

I pull a plate from the fridge, wondering what my line would be. The plate has a note attached: Lunch for Maud to eat after 12 p. I take the cling lm off. Its a cheese and tomato sandwich.

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When Ive nished eating I wander back to the sitting room. Its so quiet in here; even my clock doesnt tick out loud. I have hours of the day to ll and at some point I have to switch on the TV.

Theres one of those sofa programmes on. Two people on one sofa lean towards another person on the opposite sofa. They smile and shake their heads and, eventually, the one on her own starts to cry. I cant work out what its all about. Afterwards theres a programme where people run through various houses looking for things to sell. The sort of ugly things that are surprisingly valuable. A few years ago I would have been appalled at myself watching TV in the day! But what else is there to do?

I occasionally read, but the plots of novels dont make sense any more and I can never remember where Ive left off. So I can boil an egg. I can eat an egg. And I can watch TV. After that, Im just waiting: Elizabeth is the only friend I have left; the others are in homes or graves. Shes a fan of these running-about-selling-things programmes, and has a hope of one day nding a disregarded treasure. She downloads all sorts of hideous plates and vases from charity shops, her ngers crossed for a fortune.

Sometimes I download her things too, bits of garish china mostly, its a sort of game who can nd the ugliest piece of pottery at Oxfam. Rather childish, but Ive begun to nd that being with Elizabeth, laughing with her, is the only time I feel like myself. I have an idea there was something I had to remember about Elizabeth. Perhaps she wanted me to get her something.

A boiled egg, or some chocolate. That son of hers keeps her on starvation rations. He wont even spend money on new razors for himself. Elizabeth says his skin is raw from shaving and shes worried hell cut his own throat.

Sometimes I wish he would. The miser. If I didnt pop round with the odd extra, shed waste away. Ive got a note here telling me not to go out, but I dont see why. It cant hurt to nip down to the shop. I write a list before I put on my coat, nd my hat and keys, check I have the keys in the right pocket and then check again at 6.

There are white stains along the pavement where snails have been attened in the night. This street always collects hundreds of casualties after a rainy evening. But what makes those marks, I wonder, what part of the snail makes the stain turn white like that? Turn not pale, beloved snail, I say, bending over as far as I dare to get a better look. I cant think where the phrase is from, but its possible it is about this very thing.

I must try and remember to look it up when I get home. The shop isnt far, but Im tired by the time I get there, and for some reason I keep taking the wrong turning, which means Ive got to walk back around the block again. I feel like I did at the end of the war.

I often got lost on my way into town, what with houses bombed to rubble, and sudden open spaces, and roads blocked by bricks and masonry and broken furniture.

Its a small place, Carrows, crammed with things I dont want. I wish theyd move the rows and rows of beer cans to make space for something useful. Its always been here, though, ever since I was a child. They only changed the sign a few years ago. Its got Coca-Cola written on it now and Carrows is squashed in underneath like an afterthought.

I read it out to myself as I go in and then I read my shopping list aloud, standing by a shelf of boxes. Ricicles and Shreddies, whatever they are.

Milk question mark Chocolate. I turn my bit of paper about to catch the light. Theres a cosy cardboardy smell in the shop and its like being in the larder at home. Eggs, milk, chocolate. I say the words, but I cant quite think what the things look like. Could they be in any of the boxes in front of me? I carry on muttering the list under my breath as I shufe about the shop, but the words begin to lose meaning and are like a chant. Ive got marrows written down here too, but I dont think they sell them here.

Can I help, Mrs Horsham? Reg leans over the counter, and his grey cardigan bags out, sweeping across the penny sweets in their plastic tub and leaving 7. He watches me walk round.

Emma Healey

Nosy beggar. I dont know what hes guarding. So I walked out with something once.

So what? It was only a bag of soft lettuce. Or was it a jar of raspberry jam? I forget. Anyway, he got it back, didnt he? Helen took it back, and that was that. And its not as if he doesnt make mistakes Ive often been short on change over the years. Hes been running this shop for decades, and its time he retired. But his mother didnt give up working here till she was ninety, so hell probably hang on a bit longer.

I was glad when the old woman nally gave up. She used to tease me whenever I came in because Id asked her to receive a letter for me when I was a girl. Id written to a murderer and I hadnt wanted the reply to go to my house, and Id used a lm stars name instead of my own. The reply never arrived, but Regs mother thought Id been waiting for a love letter and used to laugh about it long after I was married. What was it I came for?

The loaded shelves frown down at me as I circle them, and the blue and white linoleum stares up, dirty and cracked. My basket is empty, but I think Ive been here for a while; Reg is watching me. I reach for something: Its a tin of peach slices. Thatll do. I put a few more tins in my basket, tucking its handles into the crook of my arm. The thin metal bars grind against my hip on the way to the counter.

Are you sure this is what youre after? Reg asks. Only you bought a lot of peach slices when you came in yesterday.

I look down into the basket. Is that true? Did I really download the same things yesterday? He coughs and I see a glint of amusement in his eyes. Quite sure, thank you, I say, my voice rm. If I want to download peach slices, I can download them. He raises his eyebrows and begins typing prices into his till. I keep my head high, watching the cans being put into the plastic carrying thing, for carrying, but my cheeks are hot. What was it I 8.

I feel in my pocket and nd a piece of blue paper with my writing on it: I pick up a bar of Dairy Milk and slip it into the basket, so at least I will have something from the list.

But I cant put the peaches back now, Reg would laugh at me. I pay for my bag of cans and clank back down the road with them. Its slow going, because the bag is heavy, and my shoulder and the back of my knee are hurting.

I remember when the houses used to whiz by as I walked nearly running to and from home. Ma would ask me afterwards about what Id seen, whether certain neighbours were out, what I thought about someones new garden wall. Id never noticed; it had all gone past in a ash. Now I have plenty of time to look at everything and no one to tell what Ive seen.

Sometimes, when Im having a sort-through or a clear-out, I nd photos from my youth, and its a shock to see everything in black and white. I think my granddaughter believes we were actually grey-skinned, with dull hair, always posing in a shadowed landscape. But I remember the town as being almost too bright to look at when I was a girl. I remember the deep blue of the sky and the dark green of the pines cutting through it, the bright red of the local brick houses and the orange carpet of pine needles under our feet.

Nowadays though Im sure the sky is still occasionally blue and most of the houses are still there, and the trees still drop their needles nowadays, the colours seem faded, as if I live in an old photograph. When I get home theres an alarm clock ringing. I set it sometimes to remind myself of appointments. I drop my bag inside the front door and turn off the alarm.

I cant think what its for this time; I cant see anything to tell me. Perhaps someone is coming. Did the estate agent turn up? Helen calls, her voice broken by the scrape of her key in the front door. He was supposed to arrive at twelve.

Ashley Elizabeth Dodges

Did he? I dont know, I say. What time is it now? She doesnt answer. I can hear her clomping about in the hall. Where have these cans come from?

How many bloody peach slices do you need? I tell her I dont know how many. I tell her Carla must have brought them. I say Ive been at home the whole day and then I look at the clock, wondering how Ive managed to get through it all. Helen comes into the sitting room, breathing out sweet, cold air, and Im a child again, in my warm bed, and my sisters icy face presses against my cheek for a moment, and her chill breath whispers over me as she tells me about the Pavilion and the dan cing and the soldiers.

Sukey was always cold coming home from a dance, even in the summer. Helen is often cold too, from so much time spent digging about in other peoples gardens. She holds up a plastic bag. Why would Carla leave tins of peach slices in the hall? She doesnt lower her voice, even though were in the same room, and she holds the bag high off the ground.

You have to stop going shopping. Ive told you I can get anything you need.

I come every day. Im sure I dont see her that often, but Im not going to argue. Her arm drops and I watch the bag swing to a stop against her leg. So will you promise? Not to shop for food again?

I dont see why I should. I told you, Carla must have brought them. And, anyway, if I want to download peach slices, I can download them. The sentence has a familiar ring, but I cant think why. If I were to grow marrows, I say, turning a shopping list to the light, where would I best plant them? Helen sighs her way out of the room and I nd Ive got up to follow her. In the hall I stop: I cant think what it is, I cant work out where its coming from.

But I can hardly hear it once Im in the kitchen. Everything is very clean in here: As I open a cupboard door two scraps of paper utter to the ground.

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One is a recipe for white I get a roll of sticking ribbon, long glue ribbon, out of a drawer to stick them back up again. Perhaps I will make a white sauce today. After Ive had a cup of tea. I switch the kettle on.

I know which plug it is, as someone has labelled it kettle. I get out cups and milk, and a teabag from a jar marked tea. Theres a note by the sink: Coffee helps memory. That ones in my handwriting. I take my cup through to the sitting room, pausing in the doorway. Ive got this rumbling in my head. Or perhaps its coming from upstairs. I start up towards the landing, but I cant do it without holding on to both banisters so I step back and leave my tea on the shelf in the hall.

Ill only be a minute. My room is quite sunny, and its peaceful here, except for a sort of growl somewhere in the house. I push the door shut and sit at my dressing table by the window. Bits of costume jewellery are strewn across the doilies and china dishes; I dont wear proper jewellery now, except my wedding ring of course.The girls at the exchange teased me about it, and every now and then when I was young Id try some out, borrow a friends or use one Id been given for Christmas, but I could never stand to have it on for more than a few minutes.

Sometimes I wish he would. A round-cheeked girl in front of the mirror taking out her curlers for the rst time, a pale young woman in the Pleasure Gardens looking down into the green river, a tired mother with untidy hair, half turned from the dark window of a train as she tries to pull apart her ghting children. But the clues she discovers seem only to lead her deeper into her past, to another unsolved disappearance: her sister, Sukey, who vanished shortly after World War II.

I start up towards the landing, but I cant do it without holding on to both banisters so I step back and leave my tea on the shelf in the hall. Snow has collected on the ridges of a shoeprint and it looks like a tiny dinosaur fossil freshly uncovered. I have that written down too. It makes me squirm with memories. I cant think what it is.